New Year's Day / Reflections Of A New Day

We will open the book.
Its pages are blank.
We are going to put words on them ourselves.
The book is called Opportunity and its first chapter is New Year's Day.

--Edith Lovejoy Pierce

In the wake of all the excitement and pandemonium that was New Year's Eve and after making cheerful and excited phone calls to family and friends at the stroke of midnight, I sat alone with the buzz of the t.v. (more specifically, Dick Clarke's Rockin' Eve) as my only company. I hadn't planned on ringing in the New Year alone, but the more I thought about the events of the past year, the more sense it made. I've begun to feel like I've lost track of myself. My last long term relationship was evidence of that. But it’s not just in my relationships that I feel this way. It's in my work and in my heart. I'm starting to ask myself: who is this woman? I needed to find myself again.

And so, in the light of day the mission became clear: to find the woman I used to be and to begin nourishing her heart, soul and spirit. The greatest discovery of this new day came after a brief meeting with Deo and while riding on the train from the city. The plan was to head home, but instead I stayed on the train and rather than become lost in the blur of my own thoughts, I pulled out my new little camera and put the world into focus. In that moment, the train ceased being a mode of rapid transit –- it literally became a vessel for my creativity. I looked though the viewfinder and searched; finding all that I had been neglecting in recent years –- purposeful joy! I found it in the smile of a woman that I photographed on the train and in the deserted amusement park that I frequented as a child.

Coney Island -- the park that, for a time, was the epicenter of American pop culture and the birthplace of Nathan's Famous Hot Dogs, now stood silent with only the traces of what were the greatest amusements of all time. A light rain began to fall shortly after my arrival in the park and I thought it appropriate that Mother Nature would wash away the old to make room for all the new that was to come at the dawn of a new year. I made my way to the boardwalk and stood still and silently for a little while. It was here, in this park, after the day long venture that was Easter Mass; I would congregate with my older brother and cousins. Fun and laughter came easily to us, along with cotton candy and games of chance. I can clearly remember being bathed in joy as a kid -- in this park. And the opportunity to recapture the memory of that was priceless for me. With every picture I took, I saw great potential. The great potential of what will be a new Coney Island -- (the park will reopen in April of this year) and the great potential in me. There is potential for me to be fulfilled and happy and every post in this blog is grand experiment in purpose that I have been happy to discover.

I reflected heavily today and although I'm not one who believes in New Year's resolutions, as every day no matter what time of year is a perfect time to start over, I do believe in taking the time to reflect on what was and learning how to find joy in what could be. Happy New Year!

*Note:* The pictures above are ones I took while walking around Coney Island. You can see additional pictures here.